My mum, Nedda, died peacefully in her sleep in the night on August 22nd.
I saw her for the last time the evening before, and I found her tired and sleepy. Probably she was already shifting into death.
I don't want to indulge telling all the medical conditions Nedda had, which worsened with the massive stroke she suffered in november 2020. You can find hints of her last years in earlier entries of this very blog.
What I want to tell you is how extraordinary my mum was and how many things she did, some of them fundamental for my own life and experience. Forgive me if the following will not be as coherent as it should be... it took me several months to write it.
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| Nedda during one of her last visit to her park! |
She divorced as soon as divorce was legal in Italy and she raised my brother and me doing many different jobs, most of them being her own boss. She was an entrepreneur with an eye for culture, environment and progress. And that instilled in me the concept of independence - you can rely on yourself if you do your best.
I remember her art gallery in Viareggio (for which she was know as "Andromeda") - a minimal-style black&white venue that was pretty unique. I was still young, but I remember vividly her close friendship with an artist who lived upstairs in our condo, Gianni Carretti, who painted some of the most outstanding out-of-this-world panoramas. My love for space begun there and then, with art!
Nedda never failed to nourish my brother's and mine passions: in our house there were always coloured pencils, brushes and temperas, and every conceivable "educational" toy - from Lego to DAS, from Meccano to Spirograph. And she was the one who introduced me to science fiction: she bought me my first Isaac Asimov's books and whenever there was a SF movie or TV serie on, she was the first to want to watch it. She also introduced my brother and me to music, buying us classical LPs, and although music is a talent I don't have, I'll always be grateful for the worlds she opened us up to!
She also was my first role model for interacting with people. She spoke four languages (Italian, German, Franch and English) and one of the many jobs she had was as the co-director and receptionist at the Hotel Niagara. Alas, I never learned any language from her, but she was always adamant that my brother and me learn at least one language besides Italian.
Her jobs took her (and us, my brother and I) to never live in one place for very long. But that "nomadic" life I think gave me the sense of what was truly important - in the many moves we did, I learned how to let things go, taking with me only the ones I really needed (emotionally, as well as practically).
It was thanks to one of those moves that I met Alberto, when we were living in Milan. And again, the actual meeting was Nedda's doing (although she didn.'t know in advance). I was about to go and be a scrutineer during one of many Italian elections, but the same day there was the premiere of a Star Trek movie. Being a Trekker herself, without thinking she sent me to watch the movie, to hell with the elections! And in the movie theatre I met my future husband, Alberto!
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| Nedda at our wedding. |
Nedda and I had a lot of things in common and among those there is... our love of cats! Her love for nature dates as back as I remember - there was always potted flowers in our homes, but cats spurred in her the project of starting an environmental association, which in turn transformed into a major project (her last, but not the only one of her busy life) - making the agricultural fields around Alberto's house into a park, a green lung of trees and bushes, that could host animals both wild and tamed, and be the land on which to build an auditorium where to play music.
Nedda had also some passions that I didn't share at all - namely politics and economics. She was very interested, and very vocal, about her political beliefs and she had been involved with political parties since when I remember. Sometimes, due mainly to our different visions of how politics should work, we had furious verbal fights, but one thing I learned from those as well - you can be the on opposide sides, but if you fight respecting the person whom you're fighting with, there is always some good compromise to be found.
Nedda has been a strong and eclectic person, and I will always be grateful for everything she tought me.
For those of you who are curious to know Nedda reading her own "voice", here are the direct links to her various pages and profiles on Facebook, on which she was very active.
Nedda Gilè
Art Gallery ANDROMEDA
Nedda Gilè
Art Gallery ANDROMEDA
As I said on her Facebook page, if you want to remember her, the best way is to plant a tree in her name. She would be happy.
